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"Ach! Hans, Run!"

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may say "Ach! Hans, run! It's the . . ." and name a creature card. If you do,..
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Aesthetic Consultation

Name an artist. Remove the top six cards of your library from the game, then reveal cards from the top of your library..

Whenever a player plays a spell that counters a spell that has been played or a player plays a spell that comes into..
Ass Whuppin'

Destroy target silver-bordered permanent in any game you can see from your seat.

Creature — Donkey Lord (3.5/3.5)
Each other Donkey gets +1½/+1½. Whenever another Donkey comes into play, untap target creature and gain control of it..
Avatar of Me

Creature — Avatar (*/*)
Avatar of Me costs more to play for each ten years you've been alive. Avatar of Me's power is equal to your height..

Creature — Hound (1/1)
Trample Whenever a player plays a spell, put a chip counter on its converted mana cost. B-I-N-G-O gets +9/+9 for each..
Blast from the Past

Madness , cycling , kicker , flashback , buyback Blast from the Past deals 2 damage to..
City of Ass
City of Ass comes into play tapped. : Add one and one-half mana of any one color to your mana pool.
Collector Protector

Creature — Human Gamer (2/5)
, Give an opponent a nonland card you own from outside the game: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt to..
Curse of the Fire Penguin

Enchant Creature
Curse of the Fire Penguin consumes and confuses enchanted creature. ----- Creature Penguin Trample When this creature..
Drawn Together

As Drawn Together comes into play, choose an artist. Creatures by the chosen artist get +2/+2.
Enter the Dungeon

Players play a Magic subgame under the table starting at 5 life, using their libraries as their decks. After the..
Basic Land — Forest
Form of the Squirrel

As Form of the Squirrel comes into play, put a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token into play. You lose the game when it..